I’m trying to get up earlier to get a better handle on my life. And the biggest reason is so that I can get some personal time and space for myself … time to think and plan and maybe some time to write again. Until about a month ago I didn’t think that getting up earlier was possible because I was constantly tired and needed every extra second of sleep.
But things have slowly started getting a little easier. Meredith can now get her own shoes on and buckle herself into her car seat. She has also learned how to unbuckle Clara and her own self when it’s time to get out of the car. So, going places is slightly easier now, and doesn’t feel like I’m taking along the entire circus when we run errands.
Everything came to a head around the time Sophia was born. All of my realms of responsibility seemed to be at their most challenging level. It’s taken a while to recover. Parenting small children is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.
We had really gross frozen pizza for dinner a few weeks ago and I had a melt down with Kevin. That pizza was the only thing I had time to get ready for dinner that particular, hectic day. At that moment, I had tunnel vision and foresaw a future of a lot of frozen pizzas because of how busy I am. I told Kevin, “I don’t want to eat like this!! I HATE this!!!” But I felt trapped in all of my responsibility. Reality is a really hard thing for foodie like me to handle sometimes.
Wednesday, September 08, 2010
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5 comments:
Hi Amy, sorry you are finding things tough at the moment, I'm feeling very similar things at the moment, and it is good to know that I am not alone. We have days of frozen pizza, the bathrooms going uncleaned for more days than I would like, days when I lose it with the kids. I am assured that the days do get easier, and looking back, I can see that they do :)
I can relate!!
Add me in for another "I can relate!" This IS the hardest thing I've ever done.
I just had a similar moment recently doing errands with my kids (except Sarah is 20 months old so it has taken me longer to get there!) when I realized it wasn't that bad anymore to take them from store to store. Hannah can buckle herself in, which helps, and somehow things seem easier.
It definitely is difficult to parent small kids. I have a personal aversion to frozen pizza, but I have a lot of other types of moments when I say "wait, no, the real Catherine doesn't do this!" I have a hard time adjusting my expectations.
Good thought to write early. I was just thinking I need to tweak my schedule to write early and exercise late instead of vice versa. I hope you keep getting enough rest and things settle down for you!
Having eaten many frozen pizzas myself, I whole heartedly understand your emotions ;)
Hang in there. Mothering does get easy, especially between ages 5-6. Until then, Meredith can gradually step up her big sister responsibilities.
My boys thought that Clara was adorable yesterday speaking about her trip to Turkey Run.
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